Monday, April 12, 2010

Worm

So today I was in a moment of self-reflectivity. I do that sort of shit a lot. I was in that moment, and I was thinking, Shane, buddy boy, ol' buddy ol' pal, if you could sum your life up in one word, just one word, what would it be? And I thought about this, and I didn't really think for long before I found a word that stuck. Sure, chivalrous would have been a decent word. Sure, intelligent would have been pretty neat. Sure, I may freely admit to being those things and many others, but it doesn't really embody me in my entirety, I don't think of me when I think of those words. Maybe slivers of my personality, fractions of the whole, but nothing complete. And I suppose that sort of thinking has got me to where I am, and it got me to this one word. Segmented. I think many people are like this in the modern world we live in, but I find it really rings true for me. I think of segmented and I think of worms, segmented worms. And I remember "studying" them in primary school. The " " around studying because I don't exactly consider the learnings of primary school to be anything as laborous as study. To me study is high school, it's further education. In primary school, you learn, you observe, you practice. It's only in the years following that you analyse, that you pick apart for yourself, that you get in on the details and you study. In a way, my self-reflective personality turned the scalpel on myself, the segmented worm, and I counted the rings (hooray for conflicting metaphors!)

Yes, I am a segmented being. I am this, I am that, I am the other. I take snippets from here or there and I store useless bits of information and temporarily forget the vital ones. I have multiple personalities, although I'm usually just stuck on "sunny disposition" (much to the dismay of others, I'm sure). There are many facets to my life, and I'm always changing my decisions and shifting over to another segment, never really having one primary focus. Although I'm very much a person split into pieces, they're all connected (although rather obscurely), and, I would like to say, they're all moving forward.

Yours truly,
Shane the Segmented Worm.